If I could identify one core problem about the world, it's that we've been taught to distrust ourselves.
-Shakti Gawain
It’s one thing to get your feelings hurt, but it’s an entirely different level of violation when a person’s actions begin to separate you from you ability to trust yourself.
We all experience the vulnerability of loving and trusting others, and yet the risks we take to create the connections necessary for survival can also result in relational trauma that may cause a serious disconnection from self. This is sometimes the price we pay as we attempt to cultivate true belonging and are met with a lack of safety, understanding, and acceptance.
Humans are inherently designed to need connection to one another. It’s in your bones, and your nervous system depends on it. The search for love and belonging is a necessary risk that beckons to us over and over again when our mental, emotional and physical needs remain unmet, and yet we may find ourselves terrified to continue the quest in fear of repeated pain and suffering.
People who are raised in family systems that do not model reliable and safe emotional connections can unconsciously internalize the dynamics they experienced in their upbringing and then repeatedly attract the same dynamics over and over again. This cyclical pattern of relational trauma results in an ever-erroding sense of self-trust that manifests as anxiety, insecurity, low self-worth, and declining self-esteem, as well as chronic feelings of self-criticim and self-doubt.
When you try your best to find the right friends and lovers, yet you are met with continual disappointment (paired with a lack of understanding about how to change) this weakens your ability to believe you can reliably have your own back. You genuinely question if you are capable of choosing what is right and best for you.
The guilt and shame caused by such trauma patterns can cause you to feel unloved, unworthy, and like a failure. Naturally, this leads to decreasing motivation to engage in socialization which can then create a sense of resignation and increased isolation.
Truth be told…YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE.
You simply lack the tools to create and maintain meaningful, healthy and lasting connections. The people who taught you how to connect didn’t have the tools or skills themselves. So how could they give them to you?
The good news? These are skills that can be learned!
Trauma therapy with the right mental health counselor offers the keys to a lifetime of resilience, empowering you with the necessary tools to bounce back from cycles of disappointment and difficulty.
Cutting edge interventions such Rapid Transformational Therapy, a specialized form of hypnotherapy, can also assist you in directly locating the root, reason, and cause for the blocks and then permanently eradicating them forever.
What are you waiting for?
It’s time for your joyfully connected life to begin!
Check out our SERVICES HERE
CONTACT US AT (573) 603-3116
Columbia, Missouri
Monday through Friday 10am-5pm
earth@emlifecounseling.com